I haven’t blogged much these last few months. I’m not sure why, but life has been confusing. Since Magic died, Finn and I have become best friends. His stall is next to mine, and we graze in the pastures together in the day time. Finn is a good friend, and I know he really cares about me. I think it’s amazing how Hoover introduced me to both of my best friends since he died, arranging for me not to be too lonely when he passed. I did my best to protect Hoover, but in his way he surely looked after me.
The thing with Finn is that he has other friends, spends some time with the ladies, and is not bothered when we are separated because some human wants to ride him or groom me. He is not much younger than me, but seems a lot younger – carefree and confident. Hoover and Magic needed me. They appreciated my protection, having other horses chased away from them. They knew I was there for them, to protect them as best I could. Finn doesn’t need me, and he gets sometimes irritated when I chase away other horses, and particularly when I shoo those pesky mares away from him.
Truthfully, I don’t know if I am meant to be a guardian for horses like Hoover and Magic or if I am just insecure and need to have an exclusive friend. The freedom of not having to protect another horse sometimes feels great – I am learning to play a little! – and sometimes it feels scary. Maybe the difference between me and Finn is the time we have been at the Sanctuary. His early years were so horrible, but he has been at the Sanctuary nearly twice as long as I have – maybe that’s the difference.
Maybe this was Hoover’s plan. First, care for Magic, who needed and hated being apart from me, though he did have other friends as well. Then watch for Finn and let him teach me how to play, become more confident, and grow into my full self. Then maybe one day I’ll befriend a fearful horse when he comes to the Sanctuary and teach him to play and be confident. Maybe this is my road…. I just don’t know.
I will listen for Hoover in the high pasture tomorrow.
I am Thor and I am an Equamore horse.
